Comebacks

Man: Haven't I seen you someplace before?
Woman: Yes, that's why I don't go there anymore.
Man: Really? I heard it was because everyone there calls you a fat slut.

Man: Is this seat empty?
Woman: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.
Man: Probably because you will be on your knees sucking on my cock.

Man: Your place or mine?
Woman: Both. You go to yours, and I'll go to mine.
Man: That's cool, cause after I'm done shagging you in the back of my car, I don't give a shit where you go.

Man: So, what do you do for a living?
Woman: I'm a female impersonator.
Man: So that's how you got that little moustache.

Man: How do you like your eggs in the morning?
Woman: Unfertilised.
Man: No problem, I can always shoot my load on your back.

Man: I would go to the end of the world for you.
Woman: But would you stay there?
Man: Probably, cause you seem like the kind of chick that is impossible to shake off once you shag .

Man: If I could see you naked, I'd die happy.
Woman: If I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing.
Man: That works for me....as long as you are still a little warm when I shove it up your arse.

Male: Would you like to dance?
Female: I'd rather die.
Male: I think you misheard me. I said your arse looks fat in those pants.


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